Water Water Everywhere

Photo by Matt Hardy on Pexels.com

This week starts Street Parking’s 2020 Julian vs. Miranda Challenge. It’s basically a fun challenge/competition that splits Street Parking members who sign up into one of two teams: Team Julian or Team Miranda. Your boy is Team Julian.

Los Gallos, where you at?

You earn points in eight different ways, split between daily points and weekly points. You earn daily points by:

  • Supporting your team
  • Eating veggies
  • Abstaining from alcohol
  • Drinking water (for me, 80 oz/day)

Weekly points are earned by:

  • Logging daily workouts
  • Performing Maintenance workouts
  • Completing Mindset challenges
  • Completing bonus challenges.

This week’s Mindset challenge is a good one. It’s choosing which Daily point will be the most difficult to achieve on an everyday basis, identifying three reasons why I typically fail in achieving it, and three ways I plan on overcoming those reasons.

Well, three of the four daily tasks aren’t that difficult for me. I’m a good rah-rah guy. No issues there. Eating veggies a few times a day has become a habit (though I know I can do better), and I swear I’m abstaining from alcohol more than I’m partaking of it these days.

Water, though..I’ve tried water challenges in the past and have failed miserably every single fucking time. I’ll start off strong, pound water the first day or two, and then watch my commitment completely disappear.

Why? What three reasons hold me back?

1. I’m a coffee fiend.

Before working out in the morning, I’ll have pre-workout. It’s not coffee, but it sure as hell gives you that early morning kick. Then, after working out and starting with breakfast, I’ll have my first actual coffee of the day. About 10 o’clock, I’ll pour myself a second cup. And then around two or three in the afternoon, you know what time it is. That’s right! Coffee break time! Iced. Cold brewed. Hot. Whatever. I just want to inject more coffee into my veins.

It’s not healthy. I know. I’m aware. Doesn’t matter. I like it, and it may the one vice that I allow myself to give into whole hog.

I mean, let’s get this right: Coffee is fucking delicious. Water, my friends, doesn’t compare to the roasted bean. It just doesn’t, and nobody will be able to convince me otherwise.

So, yeah. Coffee. Fiend.

2. It makes me pee. A lot. A whole lot.

All kinds of people report that increased water intake leads to increased focus. For example:

I’m calling complete and 100% bullshit on that. Maybe the next month will prove otherwise, but when I’m into deep work, when I’m focused on my daily to-do list and cranking out chapters or animations, having to leave my desk every 20 minutes for a bathroom break sure doesn’t feel like a way to stay focused.

Instead, it pulls me away from what I’m working on—and continues to do so the rest of the fucking day!

3. I’m just not that thirsty most of the time.

Seriously. I’ll pound water during and immediately after a workout, but if coffee is so damn dehydrating, how come I’m not always wanting to drink more water?

Any time these challenges happen, I feel like I’m back in Marine Corps boot camp with Sgt. McFadder screaming at me to finish my canteen in the next 10 seconds unless I want to spend the next 30 minutes doing burpees in the sand pit.

Force drinking water wasn’t fun then, and it isn’t fun now.

So, how am I going to overcome these roadblocks, these barricades to drinking my 80 oz of water every day? Let’s see.

Solution #1

You probably think I’m going to say that I’m going to cut back on coffee. Nope! Think again, Charlie. Like I said, I fucking love coffee. It’s the nectar of the fucking gods and I deserve to have one fucking vice. (Yes, that’s a lot of F bombs, but I’m pretty passionate about this.)

In other words, I’m going to keep pounding coffee like the government is going to forcibly take it away from me.

So, instead, mornings won’t be exclusively for coffee anymore. I’m now going to drink water alongside my coffee.

New plan in effect

I think it’s a solid plan except for…

Solution #2

Fuck, the peeing thing. Huh. I guess I’m just going to have to deal and hope that my body adjusts to my increased hydration level. According to this Vox article, you can train your body not to pee as much. Sounds iffy, but why not.

And if I continue to pee a lot, I’m going to look at the bright side. Increased trips to the bathroom coincide with an increase in hand washings—and in 2020, that’s not exactly a bad thing, right?

Solution #3

I’m using the Productive app to track a few different habits (working out, journaling, meditation, ukulele practice, and Duolingo practice, just to name a few). I’m adding in drinking water, and putting that fucker on Boost Mode, which basically means my phone is going to scream at me every 30 minutes to drink more water.

Every time I see that reminder pop up? Chug, baby, chug.


So that’s it. Check in with me at the beginning of September to see how I did. If I’m not in the bathroom peeing, I’ll let you know.

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