Obligatory New Year’s Post

Goodbye, 2021. Hello, 2022. You look bright and shiny and new. Admittedly, I see a glimmer of darkness inside of you, a sense that you’re perhaps too close of a sibling to 2021 to allow complete comfort. I don’t trust that you’re going to be a good year, necessarily, but I’m hopeful that at the very least you’ll be a better year.

I don’t want to tempt fate and say that you’ll definitely be a better year, because all kinds of heinous shit could fuck that up, but let’s just say that I’m hopeful.

Why hopeful? Well, I feel like I’m coming out of my funk. I think the depression has lifted, if not completely, then mostly. I’ve been lighter; still stressed, but lighter. And the stress is coming from different places, different things; it’s coming from switching jobs and learning new faces and names, new roles and responsibilities, and finding my place at a new employer for the first time in 16 years.

It’s been different. Exciting. Daunting. Reinvigorating.

It’s been challenging, and if there’s one thing I know about myself, I rarely duck out of a challenge.

I don’t know if I have goals for you, 2022. I definitely don’t have resolutions. Those are just bullshit. I do want to see my friends more this year, to share smiles and laughs in person. I want to get back to consistently working out. To moving weight. To earning my food, and perhaps losing some pounds and fitting back into clothes that aren’t quite my size at the moment. I ran a bunch last year, but I want to get back to the garage.

To that end, I think I need to rejoin the world of social media. I wouldn’t have realized how much inspiration an online community can help you with motivation, but it does. I think it’s time for me to get back to it, but to do so in a way where it doesn’t bother me. Because, I have to admit, other than the motivation, I haven’t missed social media. At all. I’ve been rather healthy without it. But I’ve been lacking in motivation. Time to find it again. Carefully. Selectively.

I want to be a positive person again, and I think I’m getting back to that. I know I won’t be perfect, that I’ll still have many moments where I’m sour and dour and just not in the right head. I won’t beat myself up during those moments, though. I’ll accept them, work through whatever I need to work through, and get past them.

2022, you’re probably not going to be great, but I’m hopeful that you’ll be better. Let’s be better together.